Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
