aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
