So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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