the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
