remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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