Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
