Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
time to smoke my breakfast
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
