yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
