Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
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