please come you make the beer taste better
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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