Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
this beer tastes like vomit already
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
do nipples grow back?
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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