definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
My life is pants optional.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
