i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Randomize
