He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
her vagine was all disorganized.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
