your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize