my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
