Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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