2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
