remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
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