yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Randomize
