You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
