she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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