Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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