She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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