no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Randomize
