Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
