a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
