If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
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