Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
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