I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Randomize
