The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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