I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Holy shit dude........stairs
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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