That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
