no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
and she was petting her beer can
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
