I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
