Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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