And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
