Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
