Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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