That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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