Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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