My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
