I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
