Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Randomize
