Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
We need to get me chipped asap
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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