I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
