You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
And then he peed in my hair
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