i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Randomize
