I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Randomize
