And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
