this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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